So 2020 is coming up and since in a few years I'll be in my thirties (39 in 2030), it seems like a good-enough benchmark to take stock of life and what I want.
It's been a crazy ride. I've switched paths maybe four times, been homeless, thought I was going to get arrested twice, and thought I was going to die once. I have a comfortable life now and generally enjoy myself.
During that time I've reached some gainful realizations but I've also frittered away a lot of time in pointless toxic cultural escapes. My regret is not having spent more time quietly building my skills towards long-term goals or developing more specialized knowledge, as I've always been a jack-of-all-trades and more impulsive than naught... more or less.
I've always had the neckbeard gene in me for posting online and having pointless arguments or "spirited debates" but lately I've thought about how my next decade could go if I largely removed myself from social media, the news, this or next week's angry mass protest in this capitalist hellscape we call a planet. This celebrity. That politician. Some vapid outrage cycle. Today's insulting viral tweet. Another regret is not taking steps to conquer my anger and impatience sooner.
Maybe in the meantime while learning new skills and contemplating things, I would devote my time to humanitarian efforts wherever I am. And maybe I'll quit drinking.
The wheels have been rolling that way for a while so I think it would take less of a huge shift in my paradigm and more of just deciding to cut a few final frays.
I'm really hungover right now in a cafe so just something I've been musing.
Submitted December 22, 2019 at 01:17AM by Kamehwik https://ift.tt/2Zgzbf3
