So I'm stuck in a lose-lose of sorts and could use some help. Apologies for the throw away account.
I opened a credit card 10+ years ago; don't remember why. I made a small purchase with it and gave the card to my mom for safekeeping. I didn't think anything of it.
Unfortunately, I forgot that my mom has had a habit of taking money from our accounts when she ran short. I unlinked my bank account from hers in college and hid my new accounts from her thereafter because of this. (I'd go out with friends, try to buy something, get declined, and learn that my mom took money without telling me. While she'd put it back a few days later, this got incredibly annoying.)
This manifested itself again when she used my card to help purchase space for a big event for my sister. She put $2000 or so into the card. She promised she'd pay that back. This was several years ago. Not only is the charge still on my card; she actually spent more on it since then! (She's paid it down some, but the debt is still there, and it's in my name.)
There were a few episodes since then where I gave her money and never got all of it back (and what I did get back took forever to get).
This brings us to today. She is looking to buy property to resolve some personal issues Im not comfortable disclosing. She wants to put first/last month's rent and the security deposit on my card. I don't know how much it is yet, but given that she lives in a HCOL area, I'm expecting this to be at least a few thousand dollars (probably more; Im pessimistic.)
If I put my foot down, I'm betraying the family. "I'd do the same for you" is the usual retort followed by lots and lots of circular arguments that lead to frustration on both sides. However, given the circumstances behind this, I am afraid that Ill lose her/my family if I say no.
Has anyone been in this predicament? I don't know what to do, and I'm scared that Ill have a debt in my name that'll never go away (or that I'll have to ultimately pay myself). We'll also be in the market for a house in a few years; Im afraid that this will hurt us there as well.
Thanks for listening!
Submitted July 30, 2018 at 08:01PM by lose_lose_scenario https://ift.tt/2Ovi8jW
