Just wanted to hop on here and get some thoughts/insights from people who may have some experience with this.
I’m in my early 20s, married, and self-employed. Looking to move cross country, from the New York area to southern California.
I was fairly opposed to moving out until about a year ago. My south eastern parents have always pushed loyalty, togetherness, etc as general principles in life, pretty much telling us that our family (twin sons + mom & dad) should always stay together. However, growing up in the West & just growing up (personal interests, tendencies, hobbies, making money, goals, lifestyles, etc) have changed my perspective on that a bit. Over the past year, for a number of reasons, I’ve made the decision to move out. Here’s a few reasons why:
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I am growing a bit impatient with my father who is constantly advising, irritating, and/or putting me down. I love him to death, care about him more than myself, but I think he may be a slight hindrance in my path towards achieving my goals as he just does not think the same way. He’s a tremendous person, and has nothing but good intentions, but as per my observation, this is just the way it currently is.
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I train jiu jitsu. Religiously. I train at the least 5 times a week, and the sport (aside from family/friends & work) takes up my life. There’s an academy which I’ve dreamt about training at ever since I started jiu jitsu that is in the proximity of where i’d move. I flew out a couple of months back and spent a week training there. It was incredible, and I have a strong feeling that being there will be incredible for me.
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I believe that at this point in my life, with everything going on, this is the move. I do have a comfortable life here, but that’s the problem, it’s a bit too comfortable. I feel that once I venture out into the unknown and start a new chapter of my life, so to say, an entirely new set of doors will open.
There are also events which have recently unfolded which seem to me to be further cementing my decision to move. They signal to me that staying here would only be a detriment to my growth.
As I’ve mentioned, I’m self employed. I have my own business. It’s e-commerce related. I bring in 5 figures in net income monthly, and although growth is not linear, the numbers will only increase. I also have a decent chunk of cash saved up (6 figures). My wife, at the moment, works a regular job and brings in considerably less, but the plan is to get her career started once we move out there.
The average rent for a 2 bedroom 2 bath is almost $3250, and we’d be splitting it almost 70/30. On top of that, with utilities & all, I believe total monthly rent would be $3500. I’ve created a monthly budget, and have all of the expenses in order, but I am a bit hesitant about signing a long-term lease. What if the building is dirty, what if the neighbors are too loud, what if maintenance sucks, what if we hate that part of town, etc.?
So, my first real question is — How should I vet a good apartment? Should I fly back out there for a couple of weeks, do some in-person tours, and then choose?
Or should I get an Airbnb for a month, experience life there, and then look for an apartment?
Question #2 — We both have cars. Should we drive them cross country (2000+ miles) with some essentials for the new apartment? We’ll 100% both need them there.
Should we have them shipped (quite expensive)?
Question #3 — How easy is it to find a job in a new state? My wife doesn’t have a great resume, she’s really only worked at bakeries/grocery stores/local shops/etc but she is incredibly organized, well-spoken, and just an extraordinarily & naturally appealing person overall (objectively).
I appreciate any and all tips/advice you guys may have. Looking particularly for help making the move comfortably & wisely versus being told not to make the move! :)
However, if you do notice any glaring holes in my plan, I sincerely ask that you please do let me know! We’ve been thinking about this for some time now, & I’ve made it a point to address any potential issues. Would only be helpful to patch anything that seems weak now.
Thank you, and I look forward to your responses :)
July 26, 2021 at 02:12AM
