I'm 24 years old (f), dropped out of college in 2013, job hopped for several years, and I still live at home and have been unemployed for a month now. The house legally belongs to my cousin and aunt (father's brother's family), my family is estranged from them after my dad mysteriously left when I was 13.
My mom is not employed, with a mild disability (slipped disk and a spinal surgery which means can't stand for long periods of time.)
My mom still has a relationship with my dad (they call every day) who claims he is doing something politics related (not in the US) and extremely important for the future. He claims many things. Things like he can't say certain things over the phone, and he can't give out names and he's going to come back and take care of my mom soon but he's busy with something truly life changing and he had to make this sacrifice to succeed. I truly don't know what to think of this and can't help but somehow be worried that my dad has somehow developed a mental illness with delusions of grandeur. He sends money irregularly to my mom to pay the bills. I've asked him repeatedly to contact my relatives and solve this situation that he put the rest of family in. He says he's working on it and will do something about it and not to worry about the situation, but I've seen literally no proof that he's done anything at all. He refuses to talk to my cousin and aunt who have contacted me confused because they've inquired about the housing situation and were ignored completely.
I moved into this house when I was 11, after my family filed for bankruptcy. It was one of my uncle's properties but he had suddenly passed in 2001.
My cousin has been contacting my parents to get the house. I've always been told not to be involved. She recovered from brain cancer several years ago and needs the house back to pay the bills. My parents refuse to talk to her. I've gotten emails, letters, and text messages that my family needs to move out at March because my cousin can not afford to keep us in this house.
The eviction is going to happen in March.
I don't know what to do. I've been lucky enough not to pay rent all this time but because of the cost of bills, car, debts, and living costs for my whole family has drained me of my savings. My mom refuses to get a job, and just waits for my dad. Whenever I bring up getting a job, she shuts down completely and often will start to drink and sob. She thinks she's not strong or smart enough to hold down a job as well as a fierce resentment over the idea of working again at 50 after being a house mom for so long. She also resents that my dad left her with 3 kids and a house that didn't belong to her and strongly believes if she suffers enough, my dad will save her.
I have 2 siblings that are going to top colleges and only make enough barely to get by and survive at school (ramen noodle poor college kid income level.)
I've accumulated around 2k of my parent's debt on a credit card with a high APR and have a savings of 1k. My credit score is 700. I try to be as financially responsible as I can. My mom has absolutely no savings, a horrible credit score, an unknown amount of debt that I'm afraid to ask about, and severe depression just waiting for my dad to come back. She cries every single night. No amount of me talking to her will do anything. I'm admittedly terrified. I don't know what to do.
I have video editing, graphic design, illustration, and retouching experience without a college degree. My design portfolio is outdated because of the nature of my job hopping. I've mostly worked in office admin jobs or job hopped in different fields with low wages (jobs that are $10/11/12 per hour.) I've been laid off several times due to my mental health and stress because of my life at home. I've been diagnosed with OCD and ADD although I don't ever really mention this to employers. I don't have a car anymore and all the jobs I could potentially apply to require reliable transportation.
I don't know where to start. I don't know where to start to get my mom out of this mental state. I don't know where to live and what to do next month. I don't have the money to move out. My family is Asian and my parents are vehemently against therapy/mental health help and my mom believes seeking help is humiliating. She also believes my dad is doing something great... but I believe it's out of desperation to be better than the people in her life that she resents. She won't change her mind.
TL;DR: I am a 24 year old with no college degree and my family will be evicted next month with little to no savings. My mom is severely depressed and my estranged father might be mentally ill and dragging my mom into this fantasy of success and happiness and stability if she just waits for him. What should I do?
Submitted February 13, 2018 at 08:19PM by interstellarrr http://ift.tt/2F0y8G6
