Edit: Added missing "and."
I need a new place to live.
Hey Reddit, first time poster, long time lurker. I normally stick to the gaming subs (TF2, Overwatch, DotA, Magic, D&D) but I learned about the more grown-up parts of this site so here I am today.
- I am 33 years old and I live with my 55 year old mother, my late-20s cousin, and his early 20s girlfriend/wife (can't tell if they're actually married or she's just using his name). I am looking to move out of this home we share because I can't take the emotional abuse anymore (see below if you want to hear my sob story, otherwise, just ignore it).
- By my reckoning, I have about $25,000 tied up overseas, which we're trying to bring in legally. My brother is advancing me an unknown amount this Tuesday.
- Currently, I spend $1000 per month on the mortgage, about $150 per month on electricity (which is several months behind), $100 per month on water and sewer and garbage, $170 per month on Spectrum TV, Internet, and phone, and $45 on my cellphone. That's $1465 per month on utilities and mortgage alone.
- I prefer preparing and cooking my own meals to eating out, so I can probably save a lot of money if I continue to do so in my new home. I do not drink alcohol, soda, coffee, or anything other than water. From time to time, I can drink juice, but I mostly drink water.
- I am obese and have high blood pressure and diabetes because of this. However, I have gone down to 320 lbs. from my peak of over 360 lbs. when I stopped weighing myself. I went down to 313 lbs. last week but the stress has obliterated my progress, though I have since stabilized again at 320 lbs. The last time I went to the doctor, though, my HPB was under control and my diabetes was much better than it had ever been since I was diagnosed about a decade ago.
- Once a week, I go to my FLGS to play Magic: the Gathering. The entry fee is $5 and on some weeks, I pay nothing since I use banked store credit to pay for it. I maintain only two decks, one for competitive play, and the other made up for casual play so I can play with the casual players in my community without completely obliterating them. I never impulse buy cards.
- I have access to two vehicles whose ownership is in question: a 2012 Dodge Grand Caravan and a 2006 Chevy Cobalt with a broken starter. I will need the money that my brother is advancing before I can get the Cobalt fixed. I've been told by the neighbor across the street (as well as YouTube videos I watched) that I can do it myself. He can even lend me the tools to do it so I can save even more money.
- I've been unemployed since November. I got fired from my second last job due to my mother's shenanigans; we both got fired because of her toxicity, although I remain on very good terms with my former bosses and coworkers. I got let go from my previous job because I wasn't good at it. On my assessment sheet when I was let go, I basically failed at everything except ethics and morals and getting along with coworkers, i.e. they think I'm a good man but I suck at the job, so they couldn't keep me.
Incoming sob story, feel free to ignore.
February 12, 2018
My mother slipped and fell on the sidewalk. She lay in sub-freezing temperature for about fifteen minutes by her reckoning, and only survived because the garbage man found her. I believe he got the attention of one of our neighbors, and she knocked on my door for help.
No one in my house or in the neighborhood heard her scream for help because her two dogs drowned out the sound of her voice. She has two completely untrained dogs that she does not take care of properly - she doesn't walk them nor play with them, and she simply gives them food and water whenever they bark until they shut up (they never do).
Anyway, she was taken to the hospital, where she remains as of the time of this writing.
February 16, 2018
My mother's two dogs would not stop barking in our fenced-in yard. I tried to get both of them in but only managed to get one of them; the other refused to come in no matter what I did. At 11:00 PM, the neighbor who lived behind me came to my door and told me to get the dogs in. He was drunk and enraged, but I felt no fear at all. I promised him that I'd take the dogs to the animal shelter tomorrow.
February 17, 2018
My cousin and his girlfriend found out what I did. He was furious, and, fearing for our safety, I called the police to ask for an escort home so I could retrieve the dogs' paperwork (which I left behind because one of them slipped out of her leash and I didn't want to have to chase her down in case she got loose). The cops told me that they couldn't help me unless some crime actually occured, but advised that I should use the voice recorder app on my phone to document everything.
I go back home, and no one is there. Shortly after arriving, my cousin and his girlfriend arrived and he banged on my door, trying to get in. We had a screaming match through my locked bedroom door, which was documented on my voice recorder app. I then called 911 on him. The cops talked to everyone there. They also listened to the voice recording. We were advised to stay away from each other.
Oblivious Animal Cruelty
Turning in the dogs was less-than-legal since I'm not their owner, but I did so because they were a nuisance to the neighborhood and no one in the house takes care of them properly. Other than myself, no one there knows how to properly take care of animals, and I don't want to take care of them. They simply shove food their way until they stop barking, which means they never do. They don't play with them nor walk them.
Heck, plants under my mother's care wither and die, and she finds this funny. My cousin once kept his pet rabbits in a small cage in our old house for their entire lives, keeping them alive but not allowing them the freedom to move around. My mother and my cousin are basically Elmyra from Tiny Toon Adventures or Darla (the kid with the bracers) in Finding Nemo: Obliviously cruel to animals they "love."
However, the neighbors will back me up, last time I checked, and the animal shelter agrees with my assessment that the dogs will live healthier and longer lives away from my mother. One of my neighbors told me that my fellow Americans care more about pets than kids, and when they find out how my family treats their dogs, I will likely get off from Felony Animal Theft (50/50 chance that my mother files charges against me).
Double Standards and Financial Irresponsibility
Okay, so here's the deal. I pay the mortgage and the utility bills in this house. Or at least used to, until my money ran out. My family has never treated me with respect, and treats me completely differently from everyone else at home.
When my cousin ran our cellphone bill $800 over what we pay every month because he kept using his cellphone while on a cruise in the Caribbean, my mother told him, "<Nephew>, we'll figure something out." When I use too many ingredients in my cooking, she chews me out for wasting money.
When it was just me and my mother living in this house, our thermostat was fixed at 75F and 65F in summer and in winter respectively. When he moved in here, she changed it to 72F and 68F. He didn't get chewed out for not layering clothes, while my mother yelled at me for not wearing weather-appropriate clothing.
Both of them are very bad with money. In December, while I was scrambling to pay bills, my cousin, my mother, and my cousin's girlfriend went on a cruise to the Caribbean.
In the past, I have had to bail out my mother from a payday loan because she didn't read the fine print and was too ashamed to borrow money from me, despite her knowing that I have a standing offer to lend her an arbitrarily large amount of money that she can pay at cost and at her convenience. The whole debacle cost us thousands more than what it would've cost if she just fucking borrowed from me. She also routinely overdrafted on her checking account just so she didn't have to borrow from me when she needed groceries, because she didn't want me to know that she was broke.
Oh right. Almost forgot.
First post!
Submitted February 19, 2018 at 06:44AM by JSLardizabal http://ift.tt/2C6ajy4
