This is a throw away account. I'm 29, I don't have a job, I'm on food stamps, I have an associated degree in science, but my body is weak from a birth condition. I've had to rely on her my entire life, some days it's impossible for me to even wake up because of my hypoglycemia. I don't know how I'm suppose to live a functional life with all this going on with my body.
She has been trying to fix the home air conditioning for a year now, during a heat wave in Texas. She would go downstairs every day and work in the garage then come inside, about to pass out. I fought with her about it, saying that she can't do this to herself and she's going to get hurt. She never listened because she thought she could power through. When I found her, she was bent over a support beam with her face sucking on an air duct. I thought she was stuck until I tried to pull her out and she didn't sit up. I called 911 and they took her away. When I got into the ICU, she still wasn't responsive, no matter how much they cooled her down. She was like a fish out of water, gasping for air with no response from anything I said or did. She didn't move her eyes, blink, she couldn't even grab my hand. There was nothing there. I spoke to her and her heart monitor changed but I don't know if that was just her body trying to survive.
So far, my uncle has wired me some money to help get air conditioning in the house but I don't know what I need to do with the money. I can't afford her mortgage payments, I can't even afford to have someone mow the lawn. I've never experienced a family members death before, especially the single mom who raised me. I don't know where to start with this, I don't trust myself with anything I do at this point.
The ICU got my consent an hour ago to put a main line into her, I'm assuming they're trying to keep her alive until I either run out of money or we go bankrupt keeping her alive. The nurses told me to leave the hospital, I'm sitting at home doing nothing when I should be prepping. Do I cancel her subscription services? Insurance? What about her disability money, she wanted to try to get me cleared as disabled because of how much my condition has affected my childhood. Is that even a reality? I don't want to leech off the government but I don't know where to turn to. I won't be able to afford bills at the end of this month, I don't think I can even access her bank account. Please help me, I'm not ready for this.
edit: it's 10:28 pm right now, I'm going to go lay down for a bit.
Submitted July 16, 2020 at 10:33PM by oldredditacc3123 https://ift.tt/32s7eVy
