I'm addicted to the internet. The deluge of quick, nonstop, intense intellectual stimulation is incomparable and has generated a stream of dopamine bursts that have rewired my brain to perceive anything else as unbearably slow and boring.
For a while now I've been planning to cure myself of this addiction by going somewhere with no internet for at least a month. Without the constant overstimulation and my brain working normally again, regular activities would actually seem fun and interesting to me.
This thought is what gives me pause.
If it's thanks to my addiction that I don't care about not having things, then maybe it's the reason why I was able to simplify my life so much. Why I can so easily resist buying stuff when everyone else seems to buy junk nonstop, and why I can so easily give up luxury when regular people seem to be outraged by the slightest loss.
What if I cure myself from internet addiction, and suddenly, normal activities that currently don't interest me start looking fun? Wouldn't I suddenly desire a bunch of expensive things that I was fine living without before?
I'm genuinely worried that it's straight-up impossible to find contentment. If I don't want anything, I'm miserable because nothing is fun, and if I want everything, I'm miserable because I can barely get anything.
Submitted April 19, 2020 at 10:58PM by Tripoteur https://ift.tt/2xwXv3b
