So last night I was at a friends birthday party until midnight and I was planning on taking the public transportation home, because I have a monthly pass so it's at no extra cost to me.
It takes an hour to get home via bus, with one transfer (no walking). It takes 20-30m by car, but in my experience when you get uberpool or shared lyft, it literally is the same time (sometimes even LONGER) than public transportation so I don't really see the benefit in it unless I'm truly in a pinch with no bus/train available.
Anyways, I was leaving with my roommate and we both had a plan of departure and were ok with taking the bus together home (the stop is right outside our place so it's not unsafe in terms of arriving home). But as we were leaving, everyone gathers to say our goodbyes and asks us how we're getting home. They then proceed to freak out and insist on us taking an Uber for our "safety".
I know it's coming from a good place but honestly I've taken the bus and train past midnight and it's fine. Especially since my place is right outside the stop. I just kind of feel like ppl insist too much sometimes, and all for what? if safety was truly an issue, as a friend I would tell them as long as they're safe it doesn't matter how they get home, and text me when they get home and call me if something happens. you're following through on making sure they get home safe.
Instead these friends (who are more like acquaintances than close friends) kept insisting on getting an Uber, "just take pool, its sooo much cheaper!"
Normally I'd just nod and smile and pretend my uber is here and then go via bus but then my roommate says out loud at that she prefers an Uber too. So I just say ok and go along with it.
Honestly I'm ok with spending the money since my roommate expressed that she prefers Uber and we were going back together, but would I have done it if I was alone? Nope.
It's not my business how other people spend their money and life choices, but seriously a bus pass is 1.25 including transfers and an Uber pool is $14, both of which lands you home at the same time (actually Uber is sometimes slower than public transpo). PLUS Uber pool makes you walk to and from pickup also from drop off to your home, and public transportation lands me outside my home, only downside is waiting for transfer which is nbd to me.
As we head back via Uber my roommate then bitterly complains about how she spent so much money today and I just nod and listen without preaching because I don't want to be a frugal jerk. I'm pretty sure that she knows which way is cheaper but she just picked and preferred convenience in the end (but also wanted to vocally complain about her choice I guess).
I guess this is mostly just me ranting but I am wondering in the future-- is it ok to just head home separately if I don't feel paying for an Uber is worth it? Once or twice is fine but I don't want this to be a regular occurring expense.
In my eyes, I see it as my roommate goes home the way she wants, she's happy since she wants to Uber and I go home the way I want and I'm happy. And we have a friendship where we're pretty independent, and she also knows about my frugal tendencies and spending habits.
I can also see her maybe not being happy because it'd be cheaper for two people to split an Uber than if she were to go home herself via Uber. Also it is probably not socially acceptable LOL but I feel like my roommate does her own thing a lot out of her own needs, priorities, and putting herself first so I wonder if it'd be ok as a next time approach.
Anyways constructive criticism would be nice and maybe how you guys deal with this situation in frugality/social situations. Thanks!
February 17, 2019 at 11:46AM
