If this shouldn't be here, then let me know...
I need some advice on a situation. I've been staying at a friend's for a little over a month (in a cluttered room the size of a shoebox. My clothes are all still in my suitcase. This is just to give an idea of the situation - it's be no means cushy). I have spent about $350 on groceries for her family and I gave her a nutribullet that I bought new. I also do things like babysit, take care of her daughter, pet sit on long weekends when they go away, walk their dog every day, cook for them, clean etc. It's taken up a big chunk of my time.
This family is a perfect example of what in debt/non-frugal people are like. They are in a lot of debt (over $40-50k). They have a caravan, hot tub, and lots of credit card debt.
This friend also has three full breed dogs, two of which are puppies. She was almost in tears saying how it will be so expensive to get them both spayed. I offered to pay for it. And then her husband made this snide comment that put me off. And then they were discussing how they are going on an expensive vacation this summer. They also made a comment about my laptop with a cracked screen and hinge (I still use it because I'm frugal like that and it works... I go without a lot of things and I have a savings account that shows for it). They said something like "Omg, you're still using that? Geez. Get a new one already." I also have an iphone 6s I got in 2016 and is fully paid for and I have no need for a new one while they have the latest ones and they wrack up 250+ cell phone bills.
The other thing is that I am a new widow. My fiance died recently - very recently. This has taken such a toll on me mentally and emotionally. I haven't been able to work since he died, but will return to work soon when I go back to my country (he was from another country and I was going to be getting married and moving there... now that those plans have all been ruined, I have to start over again somehow).
To be honest, I don't want to pay for this now that they have made these comments...Am I obligated to stick to my original offer? It just irritates me so much that their priorities are so messed up. I would think that spaying your puppies would be a priority over a lot of other "wants." The "puppies" are almost a year old. I would still be willing to pay for one, but to be honest i feel taken advantage of... I have helped them out a lot in various ways and they know my situation.
I can't help but feel anger. I have been crying/upset all day because of this plus the grief I'm going through. I kind of feel like if I'm not giving something to people of monetary value or if they aren't getting something out of me, I'm basically irrelevant to everyone.. And that might also be the grief I'm feeling, but it's how I feel right now. Also, to get them both spayed will be a little under $400.
June 18, 2018 at 12:13PM
