I'll caveat this with - I'm starting therapy soon, and will hopefully address some of these deep-seated feelings.
27, F. Financially, I'm doing just fine, I think. I work as a consultant for a big tech company and have always been a diligent saver. Max out my 401K and HSA, put about $2,000 away in savings/investments each month, and maintain a decent standard of living. I have a nice apartment, a puppy, a yoga studio membership (which I paused for Omicron but typically use 5x/week), and drive a newer Honda civic that I purchased in cash a few years back. I'll save up to spend on a nice "luxury" item once in a while - for example, I purchased a secondhand digital piano for our apartment since I missed playing, and will go on a week-long vacation once per year.
Despite this, I've always been very money conscious - I get immense guilt after even petty errands runs. If I go to Target to purchase household goods, I'm always debating on whether or not I should buy the cheap trash bags, generic laundry detergent, or go elsewhere to pick up items I have coupons for. Grocery shopping is like playing a game - everything I buy has a "purpose" and must be adequately priced. I'll deny myself berries if they happen to be $3.99, for example, since I know they may go on sale for $2.50 the following week. Currently, we really need to organize our closet. I've found a way to do it for under $100, but keep delaying it since I know that technically, nobody except us sees our closet.
Technically I CAN afford it, but I convince myself I can do better and get it cheaper, or will survive without it. I just want to experience the simple joy of a Trader Joe's run where I fill up my cart with ALLL the freezer goodies, guilt free!
Recently, I picked up some freelance work and am taking home another $100/month in pocket money. Sometimes I contemplate ordering sushi delivery, or treating my fiance or mother or sister to a nice little surprise. Of course, I tell myself why spend this when I can save it or invest it?
Basically, what I'm looking for is not necessarily permission to spend, but tips and tricks on how to change my mindset to GIVE myself permission to know when it's okay to treat myself.
Kindness is appreciated.
January 14, 2022 at 07:28AM
