I [21M] am afraid to invest into a retirement savings because I fear the collapse of the US in my life time. I am already poor and am trying to change that but this anxiety leads me to trying to live my best life, by partying and spending money because I don't want to die before I get a chance to experience anything good, like traveling out of the country.
I recently took my first ever vacation and that somehow made me feel like everything is going to be fine. I don't want to go to the club anymore and waste money. I feel more confident in myself, because I feel like I have achieved a goal, And now I get to plan my next vacation and keep the momentum going. Traveling is my reason to live right now.
Before I realized how happy and confident I could actually be, I was very depressed with no will to live. I lost my social security card and wallet last year and i didn't even care because I am so broke you cant even get a credit card in my name...anywhere. I know because I tried. All it did was make my credit worse for even attempting to get credit. This made me feel hopeless and I gave up completely. I was also homeless last year.
Here's what it is...
I am uneducated because I was kicked out of High School my senior year. Before then I was expelled from school a lot so I missed A LOT of school growing up and when I was at school I was acting an ass so I am pretty retarded. I wish I paid attention when I was younger because I want to hang out with more Caucasians and Asians. Im only 21 though and it is late but I still have time to fix this and be considered successful. I dont have any real skills or certificates.
*I classify skills as something you can do to make money if you decided you didnt want to live in your state anymore. I work in a warehouse as shift lead which isn't anything special because I did the math and realized that after taxes I only make $11.25 per hour....my pay rate is $17 per hour on my pay stubs though. And again RENT IS $1200 A MONTH. I am broke. I personally know first year college students making more money than me as interns and they inspire me to do better.*
I make $21k per year after taxes. The lowest rent in Denver, CO right now is $1200 per month i believe, but my credit is terrible. I am also being sued for an eviction from 2018 due to a shitty roommate situation.
I dont have a car, nor a license which is the main thing holding me back from at least another $5k+ a year.
I have goals though.
I want to be able to afford a nice high rise apartment or loft in the Downtown Denver area. I live with my grandmother right now and she wants to move to Oklahoma with her brother and sister.
I want a BMW or something nicer with a sporty finish and amazing interior.
I want to make $60k a year by time I turn 25, and $100k a year by time I am 30.
I want to become a role model for my younger siblings who are already doing 100x better than me.
My sister asked me for money for the first time ever in life and i had nothing because after i paid rent i had $20 left. and that is living with my family.
I dont know where to go from not caring about life.
my best option is a trade. I work overnight so i have a lot of time to do it during the day time but i need to get my GED first. I don't know which trade to join but wherever i go I will know absolutely NOTHING about the subject because I wasted my life trying to do music. I will still make music but only after I can afford to do so. Before i thought that if i put my very last dollar into making music the money would return, but Oh was I wrong. No one told me you had to pay for promotion and distribution and everything else.
I just need help. I dont speak to either of my parents and they really cant help me because they are just as financially lost as i am. I was the test baby aka first born and I probably picked up some of their worst habits since they were 16 when they had me.
I am not blaming them because i know i put myself in this situation but I do often think about how it would have been to have parents who weren't going through puberty. I was a fucked up kid when i was 16 and im still pretty fucked up right now. I want a kid but I dont think at 21 that im ready for a kid...let alone 2. (Also, I am not sure if my parents used my credit cards and social to open bills but i have been screwed from day one of trying. My credit application will not get approved anywhere and is embarrassing. I don't have anyone around to co-sign because they either dont trust me that much (friends) have fucked up credit (family).) Good thing is though that i have gone this long with out credit, so i dont need it but im almost positive i will never be able to get my own apartment let alone a house.
How can I change my life around and live comfortably. Im only 21 and my hairline is receding from stress.
TL;DR - Did anyone wreck their life before 21, headed into a dead in and dead broke? How did you turn things around? How long did it take? What steps did you make? (I cant do military personally due to tattoos on my face so that is off of the table) How much do you make annually now. Which steps outside of., getting GED and license do you recommend I take to head towards earning $100k a year. Did you read any books that helped you financially? I've read 'Rich Dad, Poor Dad' and I am reading '48 Laws of power currently.'
Please help me, I really want to get my life together.
Submitted June 01, 2019 at 11:33PM by ExcellentTart http://bit.ly/2QJkYmU
