Let me start this off with I've been a long time lurker. Love some of the things that are in this thread and how many people I believe have truly gotten help and guidance. If you want the short of it scroll to the bottom of the post.
The last 5 years with my wife has been a crazy ride of ups, downs, and life kinda doing its thing. I have hit a point where I really need to come up with some kind of budget to really get things in order.
I recently went through a really bad depression and most days at least recently I am getting out if it. I don't want my family to suffer. I am currently in the ballpark of 80k in debt. I will do my best to list everything I can think of. Up until this year, I was able to manage the debt. Everything was paid on time. Nothing was ever late.
30k in student loans. (Never finished college and found out a technical career was much better suited for me this is an unfortunate bit if debt I wish I could take back. I was pushed into college because it was the thing to do during the recession to make sure you could secure an income.
10-12k in credit card/store financing.
40k in vehicle debt between mine and my wife's car.
Now if you have stayed with me this long, thank you. You are an MVP.
I didn't find out until about 2 1/2 years into our marriage my wife had a spending problem because it wasn't until my daughter was born and my wife had postpartum that to be honest took 2 years to subside. She is finally back to herself. I think she used this to cope. I worked a job where it wasn't uncommon for me to work 70-80 hours weekly. And I worked 2nd and sometimes 3rd shift when coverage wasn't available. I was making decent money 48k a year was my average but was gone all the time so any disposable income I never spent because I wasn't home to spend it.
We had low bills at the time I had a 1000 dollar beater car. Which I have basically always had. Cheap rent. Food, internet, one credit card, and my student loan payment. And my wife's car payment. (pre-marriage) Everything was good. Then the shit hit the fan. I developed severe carpal tunnel. 2 surgeons told me they have never seen someone my age with carpet tunnel as bad as mine is. In a 50 year old that's worked manufacturing sure. In a 24-year-old who has 5 years in manufacturing no.
In this process, I was let go. I live in Ohio, it's a right to work state. I had no proof as to that being why I was let go. Took a crappy entry-level job in help desk making 10 bucks an hour. During that period there were a few credit cards opened up. To help bridge the gap/my wife used for spending and this lead us to my current predicament.
Fast forward to now. My wife and I have been over the fact that all and any spending in excess needed to stop. We figured out spending was a coping mechanism for her postpartum. Not a good one. So that, in turn, isn't as much of an issue. I hate needing to scrutinize every purchase of hers because it makes me feel like a controlling dick. I am far from it. Just how it makes me feel. During all that time I kept her credit score at a steady 720.
I currently stopped paying on the credit cards we have because all I was paying was interest and basically nothing on the principal. Trying to balance if I could buy groceries or not. I've read here that sometimes it's better to let them go then settle later so you can dig yourself out of the hole a little bit.
Since then my wife's credit has dropped to 590-600.
My credit was fucked by my mother before I was 18 and trying to challenge those debts made them show back up as active. Several will fall off in the next year or 2 after the 7 year period. I didn't want to report my mother because she has mental health issues. Partly not her fault. I sit at a 530- 560 now depending in what credit report you look at.
So break down of current bills and salary. If you're still reading seriously thank you a metric fuckton from the bottom of my heart. It means the world to me.
I make 1270 every 2 weeks. I have insurance and 401k that comes out every 2 weeks. Or it would be more.
Gross is 42k a year.
Student loan 30k in forbearance atm 0 dollars a month
Wife's car: 414 a month
My car: 270 a month.
Rent 600 a month (currently, we split rent with her parents. That whole arrangement went sideways we originally moved in to help them and got stuck because moved to a shit job.
400 a month in food. (Wife and daughter have celiac )
Wife's phone 80 dollars
My phone ranges currently its off. I use mint mobile so 20 a month normally.
140 for car insurance.
We pay 1 dollar a month for Hulu.
I spend about 120 on gas a month. I have a long commute for work about 45 mins it was worth the pay increase.
I have nothing saved for emergencies.
So this is where I'm at. I know the first bit I will be told is to get rid of the cars.
Yes my wife way overspend on the car she moved up too. This was during a bad time I couldn't be with her the days she looked at it and didn't know what the loan was signed for until several weeks after it was bought. Love the van. Highly recommend the Toyota Sienna. I would have rather went with one several years older. And 20k cheaper.
My car is a Toyota Corolla which I bought when I got my new job for 2 reasons to help build what none existent credit I have and so I would have dependable transportation to work but I bought an 8k car. I think that is reasonable. Given I spend 1000- 1200 on a beater without the surprise expense of yeah my transmission blew or hey i have a new leak and its overheating. I just got tired of it over 10 years of doing that.
So that aside. Even if we did ditch the dependable cars I would lose on reselling them and would still have left over loans to pay off and need to buy 2 used cars at probably 3-4k a piece so they are safe.
I know I'll probably get roasted on some of this and that's fine i just need advice on where to go from here. Because being a single income is always wearing on me. My wife would work and did before the baby but daycare is very expensive my wife's bring home would be negligible. She tried some mlms. We know those don't actually make you money. She has babysat but the woman who she did it for moved across country and just hasn't found anyone else.
So there is is my super fuckity situation. If I missed anything let me know.
The important :
80k in debt, bring home 30,480 a year, 26 years old trying to keep it together. Life has had a bunch of twist and turns and I feel like I'm gaining back some kind of footing. We have no monetary help from any family members. Just need advice. Also would love to live on our own.
Submitted April 18, 2019 at 06:52AM by mtwilliams2448 http://bit.ly/2GjsY9k
