I (F/31) saw u/AlzScience's request for tips on how to save money on a wedding. I wrote this up for a friend/coworker and thought I'd share it with the community. (I had a mid-July Saturday afternoon wedding with 100 guests for about $7.5k.) Anyone is welcome to chime in!
Day of the Week/Time of the Day
The pricing for venues varies dramatically depending on the day of the week (which implies that it’s a matter of supply and demand—not actual value of the venue). Saturday evening is the most expensive. Friday and Sunday are the least expensive. Earlier in the day on Saturday can also be cheaper. Brunch time is a new trend that is also less expensive.
Time of the Year
Spring and summer are prime time for weddings, and venues hike up prices accordingly. Booking weddings in late fall (starting in October) or the winter can save a lot of money.
Venue
Venues are the most expensive part of weddings. I found that country clubs, restaurants and wedding-only venues were too expensive for me. Many of them had a “minimum” amount of thousands of dollars required plus extra costs. I found that public places (through the local park district) and churches were more affordable for me. Public parks can offer good deals for outdoor locations, but it’s important to remember that extra rentals (like chairs, a tent, speaker system) can add cost. I ended up finding a multipurpose room at the local park district for my reception venue. They let me know which caterers they approved of, and I picked from them. Many “wedding-only” venues don’t let you bring outside food or drink, so you’re stuck with their catering.
Churches often have large basements, and I was tempted to have a reception in one, but I was interested in serving alcohol and no church would allow that for a reception. Some churches do not let officiants other than the pastor of the church officiate the wedding. I found a church that would let me have an outside officiant.
Catering
Doing a “buffet style” meal cuts down on the number of waiters needed and reduces cost. Another lower price option is “family style” where large serving dishes are on tables. The most expensive meal style is having each dish brought out to the tables by waiters.
Some caterers (especially at fancy venues) say “$90ish per person”. That’s steep. My caterer did $17 per person plus some added costs for servers, bartender, etc.
Rather than renting tableware and silverware from the caterer, I bought nice-looking plastic plates, silverware, cups and paper tablecloths and napkins in bulk from Costco. This allowed us to throw away the dishes rather than requiring the servers to collect all the dishes to be washed.
Some people I know have done “appetizers and dessert” only weddings instead of serving a whole meal. That should be clearly stated on the invitation, in my opinion. Another friend of mine did “breakfast for dinner” as her wedding meal which also reduced cost and she used it as a cute theme.
Alcohol
Dry weddings are significantly less expensive than ones where alcohol is served. Having an “open bar” is the most expensive. You can have a limited menu in an open bar (with limited options—red wine, white wine, beer, light beer). Another option is to have a “cash bar” where guests purchase their own alcohol (it is polite to let guests know in advance). You can also find a venue that lets you provide the liquor yourself while they serve it. That’s what I did. I bought alcohol at Costco/Sam’s, had a bartender from the caterer serve it, and all leftover unopened/unused items I returned to Costco/Sam’s for a refund. I got about $300 refunded to me from that.
Photographer
Having friends/acquaintances who are (amateur) photographers can be very helpful. A friend of ours did our engagement photo shoot for free (because it gave him experience, added to his portfolio and was a gift). I would have had that friend do our wedding photos if it had been possible, but it didn’t work out. Instead, I looked up local photographers online and read the reviews. I looked through portfolios and narrowed down which photographers I thought were skilled and artistic in the way I wanted. I ended up finding an agency that had the lowest package starting at $595. The catch was that you could increase your package even after the fact, and they charged for each photo printed. Since my photographer was a contractor for that agency, I actually got him to sell me the photos directly, so that was a little shady. I’m not recommending that part!
Flowers
I was a minimalist on flowers. Through a friend, I borrowed fake flowers in vases for the reception tables. For the bridesmaids’ bouquets, my friend and I bought flowers from the grocery store and made our own arrangements. I didn’t bother with corsages for the guys or for family.
Cake
At most weddings, the tiered cake is just for show, and sheet cakes are what is served to guests. So I forewent the tiered cake, and just had a little 8” display cake that we did the “cutting” tradition on. I bought sheet cakes for everyone else. All the cakes were from Sam’s and were just plain white with the little frilly white frosting on it too. A cute cake-topper made the little cake just as display-worthy, in my opinion.
Music
Rather than hiring musicians for the ceremony or a DJ for the reception, I made iTunes playlists of the songs I wanted at each. For the ceremony, the church sound technician manned the playlist. For the reception, I had a friend hit “Play” for the first dance and slideshow, but let it play on random when everyone danced. Having friends/family play musical pieces at the ceremony is also a nice way to save money on performers and give them a special/important role.
Officiant
Having a friend/relative officiate the ceremony can save money. My uncle was the officiant for us, and it also made it more personal and special.
Invitations
I made all the printed pieces for my wedding. I made the save-the-dates, invitations, RSVP card and programs by using InDesign at work. For the save-the-dates, I got them printed like regular photos at Walgreens for about 10¢ a piece. For the others, I got them printed at OfficeMax and cut them myself.
I printed clear labels with the mailing addresses in a slanty font rather than writing them all by hand with calligraphy. I used the Excel/Word “mail merge” for the labels. It saved a lot of time.
Rehearsal Dinner
My husband’s family wasn’t too familiar with American traditions regarding their expected involvement with the rehearsal dinner. So I planned that too. We had almost a BBQ style gathering at a family member’s house. We actually got catering from Portillo’s instead of doing a full grill-out. But it definitely saved venue costs to have it at someone’s house.
Guest List
The number of guests can greatly impact the cost of a wedding. I made a list of “all possible” people I could invite versus a “restricted” list. When it turned out that many guests said they couldn’t attend, I went ahead and sent more invitations to more people (mind you, that was kind of last-minute). Keep in mind that a certain percentage of guests will say “no” and will therefore reduce the headcount. Destination weddings are often much smaller and more “intimate”.
Dress
I went to the bridal chain stores (David’s Bridal and House of Brides) to try on dresses. Then I saved the item numbers of the dress/veil that I liked and looked them up on secondhand websites (preownedweddingdresses.com and tradesy.com). I ended up finding the dress I liked in my size that had never been worn for half the retail price. I found the veil I liked for half the price on Ebay.
Hair/Makeup
I had a trusted friend of mine do my hair and makeup rather than having it professionally done. I told my bridesmaids that they could get theirs done at a nearby salon if they wanted to, but they’d need to pay for it on their own.
Hotel for Guests
I thought that a deposit was needed to reserve a block of rooms at a hotel (the internet has corrected me on this—reserving a block should be free), so at the time I didn’t reserve a block of rooms at a hotel (and stated it clearly to guests). I didn’t have many out-of-town guests, so it didn't pose a problem for us. On our wedding website, we listed nearby hotels and mentioned which hotel my side of the family was planning to stay at. Many of our friends stayed with their own friends or family in the area or used an Airbnb.
[I edited the paragraph above because I was mistaken about room blocks requiring a deposit]
Honeymoon
We ended up having our honeymoon at a family friend’s cabin in northern Wisconsin. In today’s social media culture, newlyweds often flaunt a fancy honeymoon at an exotic location. But a smaller scale getaway can be just as refreshing. Our honeymoon costs were basically only fuel and food.
Submitted January 09, 2019 at 01:26PM by colebette http://bit.ly/2VG4EFm
