Hi everyone,
Two days ago I posted a desperate plea for help. I was guilty, embarrassed and even scared. After reading through the overwhelming responses, responding to them myself, and noting down the most realistic and helpful advice- in 2 days this is what I've done. (Note: 2 days means nothing, as I know repetition and a philosophical change in how I treat money is needed).
In 2 days, I've done the following:
- Read "The Millionaire Next Door"
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what this accomplished was to take pride in setting a goal for financial independence as opposed to a goal of social status. I have a good, if not great offense, but I have huge holes in my defense. I learned that the vast majority of millionaires or wealthy individuals focus on frugal habits as opposed to materialistic impulse purchases. It was a nice reminder that there is a certain amount of pride in saying that you have this beater car or starter home, or rickety gadget because you are focused on a big picture goal.
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I cut up my credit card.
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I physically cut it up, put it in an envelope and I plan to frame it one day as a momento of a starting point for my family's eventual success.
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I sat down with my Financial Officer(who runs my company)
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I realized I had a major asset in front of my face this whole time. He runs my company's finances flawlessly, so why couldn't I ask him to help me? I employ him for god sake. He wasn't surprised at my situation, and more importantly he said to me that he already knew I was making classic young person mistakes and planned to have that convo with me soon.
He taught me a few things that PF may disagree with, but I'll tell you anyway. He said to me there is no shame in wanting or having nice things. People are different and have different vices. The most frugal people you know may have the strangest love for cigar cutters, and may be willing to collect expensive or hard to find cigar cutters for them selves. The extravagance may not present it self like a nice watch or a pricey car- but everyone has the right to be happy materially and emotionally as long as it is not harming your financial potential and future. If you are making 250k, a $700 car payment may not hurt you or even be a dent in your pocket- some people will say it's too high but if it makes you happy and it's not effecting your financial goals negatively- live it up, to a limit.
- My $799 Lease payments have been transferred to my company.
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as suggested by many of you, this payment is too high and is an anchor. I didn't think my accountant would approve it however he says it will not be a full write off nor will it help the companies bottom line or taxes much- but if I have the luxury of putting it on the company's expense- I should and I did.
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I downloaded MINT and YNAB.
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mint because it's passive and easy to see, YNAB because it's active and allows me to feel the pinch of everything. I hope I am able to keep up with the YNAB, I plan to use it everyday. I am still learning how to set budgets Bc some of YNAB's terminology and formulas are weird but I'm sure I can figure it out.
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This was the big one- I spoke to my wife and told her all.
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this was hard, had me in tears. She's so important to me, and I never want to let her down and I did. I told her all about my financial situation, I explained the ways out. I told her that from now on, we will be not only married but marrying our finances for transparency and accountability sake. I told her we will not stop traveling, we will start building funds towards traveling. We will treat it like a bill and pay towards it every month. Same with our house goals, and other luxury goals we have.
She was supportive, nervous, but excited to know I was not down or scared. My strength in explaining that I will make it out of this situation allowed for her to believe we will be ok. I also commended her for her outstanding financial responsibility. This woman makes the same amount I do, and has not a dime in debt, a $400 car payment which is over next march, and still manages to have the ability to purchase whatever she needs and contributes equally to our rent and living expenses. She is a model for a great financial and enjoyable lifestyle. Not to mention, she has saved easily triple what I have.
The next few months will be confusing, awkward, clumsy, and maybe even cause a few uncomfortable conversations for wife and I- BUT I have never been more confident about my financial future- and I look forward to updating you all again with even better news.
Thank you so much for reading.
Submitted January 12, 2018 at 07:19PM by 124boxer http://ift.tt/2DrLVVg
